Remember that comedy skit by a comedian titled 'use your head'? It happens that a promiscuous boss brought in a woman and instructed his gateman to use his head to deal with any other lady that come to visit home. After a while, a lady appeared asking for his boss, after several attempts to make her leave, the poor man decided to follow instruction by hitting her... With his head of course.
Am sorry I am kinda poor at telling jokes, but here is the point, when I said use the head, it is obviously not the physical head we carry around, it means using the sit of logic, which is our mind. With the heart we feel and process emotion, but with the head, or say mind we process things. Sometimes we may be in a relationship that feels so good and even perfect, but it may not be logical cause common sense a times will tell us we are wasting our time, but too bad, common sense most times doesn't feel good one bit.
Another thing is, people use their head more than they use the heart in marriage, Marriage is an institution driven by logic, not mere sentiment, so it is good to learn to use the head during relationship level. Lots of women become miserable at the early stage of marriage cause they have been using the heart all along, the shock of logic can be too hard to bear sometimes.
Here is how you know you've been following you heart:
1. You easily ignore issues that should be dealt with: the other person just knows d right thing to say, knows d face to pull and before you say 'bingo' you are all smiles and even happy like nothing has happened. Worst part, sometime you see some red signals which point to how she/he feels about you, but you ignore them, as long as your emotion is being fed, you are cool. This is really dangerous and the dangers are in two ways, one, you will continue to out yourself in a situation where you can be easily hurt, two, once you are done with emotion part, you will realize you have nothing left, nothing to hold on to, nithibv to keep the relationship going.
2. You never want to see them sad or angry: yea, you should make each other happy bla bla bla, but you should also face issues when they arise, but though you have things to talk about, questions on your mind, you will rather remain quite cause they may get sad or angry.
the question begging for answer Is, is that logical? Will you keeping quite make things better or make them a better person?
3. You are the only one that is blind to their faults: we are have our faults, yes, but do we have the ability to deal with all faults? Nope! That's part of our dynamism. There are many ways to react to people's faults, but ignoring faults of those we love all in the name of love is a bad way to do react. You don't want to get disappointed? Remember you are the one in love you are the one in the game, so you may not have a good view as others watching do.
yes, people gossip a lot, but in those nonsense, there may be senses, don't allow people control your relationship but you need wisdom to discern the truth. Ask yourself, why will more than five people complain about the same thing about just one person. Should you quit? No, not necessarily, but at least you will be ready for what's coming.
4. They make you do things you normally won't want to do:here come the ugly part. Can you count how many times you've done something you do not like cause you want to please them? It is the truth that we all need to make some compromises, inconvenient ourselves a little cause that's what meeting at the middle is all about, but there are somethings you are just not ready to compromise on, at least not yet, but you are doing them anyway, why? Because you want them to be happy.
Here is the bad news, if eventually that relationship doesn't work out, I can assure you gonna regret doing those things. Why? You didn't want them in the first place.
why not try use the head a little once in a while? Believe me, it may hurt at the beginning, but you will have a more matured and healthy relationship
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